ST. GEORGE VALENTINES - with some of the 'gang'!

Poppy and Livie in a snuggle!

Marianne, Tyson, Lance enjoying SUN in the window at St. George home!

Tif and Jim - Sand Hollow Aquatic Center

Livie, Marse, Tyson and Lance enjoying poolside!

Jaden, Coby and Corbin getting splashed!  These 3 guys LOVE to have fun!

Tif loves this new family addition we lovingly call 'rolly-polly' Cole-y!

Millie LOVED the water!

Anna-Lisa and Pat chased 20 month old Millie all over the pool!

Livie - ready to swim with a  'wink and a smile' and matching pink cowboy boots?

GO SOUTH OR BUST!

VALENTINES DAY found us traveling south out of the grey snow and skies of the north into  Utah's Dixie!  Despite my driving and Jim's wheelchair 'rockin' all the way (it becomes  'bouncy' when traveling), we made it in good time to enjoy sunset on the red rocks, heart shaped pizza with Marianne's family (The Welch's) and a scrumptious Valentine cookie courtesy of a 'sweet' neighbor!  (thank you Joni)!  With a good book on tape, a little cola on ice and the promise of warmer air with each new mile, it was go.... SOUTH OR BUST for Jim and Joanne - aching for a little February 'lift'!

Coby, Tiff and the boys along with Pat, Anna and little Millie, joined us Friday making for a great group ready to enjoy a beautiful southern Utah weekend.  Amazing how sunshine and blue sky can RENEW THE SOUL!  We went swimming at Sand Hallow (love the indoor slide), golfing (Coby) with his Dixie buddy Dave Chase, flew kites, walked, biked, sunned by the Lakota pool (not yet warm enough to swim in - although Coby and Corbin took a plunge or two just for kicks), ate junk food, played games and just really enjoyed each others company!  Jim enjoyed every minute of watching the 'goings on' with his children and grandchildren.  There is NOT A BETTER SPORT than my guy Jim, who just a year ago was enjoying  20 mile bike rides, scuba diving, golf (et al) and now can only observe all these physical outlets.  Yet he still finds joy in all around him and does it (truly) without a 'why me'!  This is EXEMPLARY!   This is a MAN TO LOVE!

A little 'catch up' on Jim's condition! 
He is still trusting to the Triology air pressurization machine and now needs to use it every hour of the day and night.  It pushes air into his diaphragm and by his vocal cords (which are weakening) allowing him to breath freely and speak more clearly.  His mind is as sharp as every (thank goodness, since I'm loosing mine) and he is making sure that I am learning the 'trade' of financial responsibilities and other important household tasks.  He is keenly aware that I have never held the reins on these affairs and is teaching me to be careful opening mail (not to throw away important tax documents) and checking 'zero's' behind the decimals before I push the submit button on our online bill pay!  For someone who could win the messiest DEN award, he has been, all these years, surprisingly competent and sabe (spanish) concerning our financial affairs!  I have learned much from him these past months and I'm hoping (and praying) it 'takes'!

Jim also has very little TRUNK support left and so everything below his neck is 'dead weight'!  I am so very grateful to our morning aids (Tony and Jordan) who are young and strong and able to take the strain of transferring him from bed to wheelchair.  They really love Jim and I often hear them asking him questions as he in turn, gives them all sorts of advice while they shower, feed and dress him.  His daily routine goes from bed to wheelchair to bed with all of the FUN we can muster in between!   I am also SO grateful to our sons, son in law and wonderful ward neighbors who take turns doing bedtime duty.  I think everyone really enjoys the blessing of helping Jim and visiting with him.  He remains true to his amazing talent of being a good listener.  Visits with friends are never about HIM nor his situation; a real tribute to his character!  He has been a wonderful example of humility and patience to those he is around.
Don't we WISH every day we didn't have to be the ones being the example!!!
But as long as we find ourselves in this situation, I am taking my lead from Jim and TRYING my best to make the most of what we have been handed!  We may think we have no choice, but we always have 'choice'!  That choice is to respond badly or respond well!

My sister-in-law Mary Ellen recently told me something which I found.... profound!

'We often think, when we go through difficult times, that the Lord is testing us, but that is simply NOT TRUE!  HE ALREADY KNOWS US!   The test is for us to GET TO KNOW OURSELVES!"

Brings to mind the song from 'The King and I"...GETTING TO KNOW YOU (ME?)

A great blessing that has come from our situation is that Jim and I are truly getting to know each other.  As for Jim, I am mostly discovering things under the surface that I must have taken for granted before; Jim's great  great strength of character and humility being high on the list!  As for me, sometimes I like me, sometimes I don't.  But I do feel stronger and more capable of handling our life as it is and that hasn't always been the case in my life!  Hopefully, after a lot of practice and in the eternal grand scheme, we will find that what we have been through has polished us just enough to handle what comes next!  

***Special Valentines kudos to all those who dropped by goodies or sent cards to Jim and me.  We are ever aware of how LOVED we are!

P.S.  By the way, what was with the ending of episode 3 of Downton Abbey Sunday night?  Absolutely poor form as a way to end an episode!

JANUARY with JIM!

 Corbin helps Jim eat their favorite snack -  bananas and milk with sugar!

Olivia helping Jim take his 'vitamins'!

Marianne, Luella and Olivia

Corbin, Sammi, Mason and Ben sledding on our little hill!

 Jim teaching former fellow employee the techniques of playing the saw!  (We had the 'passing of the saw' - not Jim's original) at the Dennis Group Dinner in December.  Our son Pat is also learning to play)!

Jim and Joanne's 36th wedding anniversary!

 Decorations courtesy of our daughter Marianne

"But with JOY, wend your way"!

This past week we had a front porch 'cookie drop' (my favorite kind) from a dear friend and attached was a refrigerator magnet with the above quote, "But with joy, wend your way"!   We know the song from whence this comes, but like some words that you start to say over and over, the word 'wend' struck me as one not common to our everyday vernacular so I went to look it up (Webster style - not google).  I found the word WEND means to 'proceed onward'!  It reminded me of one of my favorite pioneer songs from Primary called (I think) "Covered Wagons"!  (Sing along)

"Day after day, the wagons are rolling,

Onward and westward to our new home!

Roll along, roll along, covered wagons,

Take us safely to our new home!"

We'd like to think we are 'joyfully' wending these days and truthfully we ARE TRYING!  When asked how we're surviving, I usually give my most honest reply:

"One day we cry, the next we party"!

In Sacrament meeting today, one of my favorite young moms said she might be found guilty of trying to 'squeeze the life out of fun'!  Dear Nicole - you keep on squeezing every drop out of it because hey, we are meant to have JOY (and FUN)!   After all, when the world was created we all shouted for JOY!  It has been second nature to us since the beginning!

Still, yesterday afternoon I broke one of my mothers goblets and went directly to my 'closet' (literally) and cried big tears until my pillow was stained wet!  I have more of the goblets - no big deal!  Goblets are replaceable!  It was just time to cry!  At that moment, I so wanted to feel someones arms around me giving me that encouragement to keep 'wending'!  I prayed for it but couldn't feel it, so I got up and began to 'proceed' on with the day.  

Later on that evening, as our children gathered with us to celebrate our 36th anniversary (pictured above) I began to feel that JOY that we have been so abundantly blessed with all these years.  What a great man I married; my best friend, my true love, my great example!  We have had so many wonderful years, so much JOY, so much to celebrate! And of course, our darling daughter Marianne decorated our bedroom (as she has probably done the past 21 of her 26 years), brought me flowers commissioned by Jim and put stars on our bedroom ceiling so that during the waking hours of the night, we'd have something to look at!

Then came the rest of the gang (minus our two out-of-town-ers) bringing with them their wisdom and wit to cheer and comfort (and their big arms to hug me, as I was so missing Jim's)! There they were - all those arms of comfort!  Prayer answered!

And so, I suppose we all go along 'day after day', hoping our 'covered wagons' won't fail us and that eventually we will reach our new home.  But - we'd better go with 'loins 'girded', with 'JOY wending' and ever grateful for the knowledge that.... "our God will never us forsake"!

HAPPY DAY, ALL IS WELL! 

 

  

    

Christmas with the Jim Rich family!

 Coby and Anna-Lisa awaiting Rich 'Christmas Adam'

 Rich men in hats they all returned!

 2012 babies (from left) Charlie(Bob and Sara), Tyson(Marianne and Lance) and Coleson(Coby and Tif)

 Jim's 'angels'

 Love those lips!

Future 2020 little league-rs

Rich adult's only 'Feliz Navidad'!

 We three (Burger) Kings(?) at Rich Nativity

 One of the happy shepherds

 Joseph waiting for his next 'cue' - angel Livie looking on!

 The 'Richest' Christmas Pageant ever!

 Christmas morning - anticipation!

 Bob and Sara

 Coby and Tif

 Whitney and Ben

 Jim and Marianne (Pippi)

 Marianne, Lance and baby Tyson

What's in that punch Pat?

 Jim with Coby & Tif's new baby 'Cole'!

 Graham Cracker candy house making day!

 Marianne and Tyson, Whitney and Chace and Tiffany

 Honey assisting Sammi

 Amelia

Olivia, Luella and Jaden

F-A-I-T-H
Forward - All - Issues - To - Heaven 
My sister Margaret gave us a plaque with the above statement expressed and it has proven to be an important reminder lately of how we are getting through this journey we are on.  There have been new developments in Jim's condition which have once again brought us to our knees in prayer and also in gratitude.  I will elaborate, but first, a re-cap of a wonderful DECEMBER!
Still holding STEADY at the HELM, Jim was the master of 'celebrating'!  He handled the following events with style, sensibility and a pinch of that lately ever present sentimentality!    So here's how it played out!

December 1st - Breakfast with Santa - extended Patterson kids at Sonnenbergs
December 1st - Dinner at Country Club - Bear Lake extended family
December 2nd - Patterson Cousins Party
December 8th - Dennis Group Company Party at the Canyons Resort/andWard Party
December 18th - Graham Cracker house activity with grandkids
December 20th - Joanne's sibling dinner - Tuscany
December 21st - Bob and Sara arrive from Sacramento with Duncan and new baby Charlie
Busico (Jim's sister's family) wedding dinner - Garden Park Ward
December 23rd - Jim Rich family Christmas 'Adam' (the night before 'Eve')
December 24th - Rich extended family activity hosted by Paul and Shelley Rich
December 25 - CHRISTMAS morning with the Jim Rich Family (24)
December 27th - Jim & Joanne's children w/spouse's 'Felis Navidad' dinner (adults only)
December 28th - Rich kids sledding party
December 29th - Jim Rich family photo session at Busath (no fuss, no tears)
and....
December 31st - brought  in the NEW YEAR with Rob and Liz Patterson, a good movie and Chinese food!
In addition, we had several visits in December from dear friends who brought in dinner, treats and Christmas cheer!
Thank you so much to all!
Now, there were only a couple of the above activities where Jim was just an 'observer'!
But for the most part, he was in 'good form' and a DARN GOOD SPORT!

Amisdst the furry of all the above, our live Christmas tree lived only 'till mid December!  Since I simply could not abide a dead tree before Christmas. I undecorated, bought a new much more 'acceptable' (according to our children's standards) live tree and volia - it was totally worth the effort!
We are now 'undecorated' and feeling a little like we have PHS (Post Holiday Syndrome)!  Admit it - you've had it, right?  It's normal -  and we latch onto anything 'normal' these days!

Now to January and the issues at hand!
This week we once again made the trek to the U of U - ALS Clinic to see the myriad of 'specialists' who set about to tell you just how bad things are!  The physical therapist, occupational therapist, speech therapist, dietitian, nurse, pharmacist, respiratory therapist, blood sucker (flobotomist, I believe) and finally the the doctor.  If you're really brave, you ask to see the social worker whose face tells you that there is really no hope! (We opted not to see her again after the first visit) Yes, my sarcasm is obvious, but honestly - it's a five hour endurance test that we're not sure we're going to go through again!
On one hand, we did get many of Jim's questions answered!  On another, we were given a round of talks about the possibility of a tracheotomy and the importance of making a decision to stay with our 'sip and puff' machine or the face the trach surgery with it's pros and cons.  This has been utmost on our minds since November and we still struggle with the decision.  The truth is, Jim's lung capacity is now at 17 %, a steady decline from the 110 % in June when we visited the Phoenix Mayo Clinic.  His oxygen level is still good.  This just means his diaphragm is struggling to take in air on it's own.  Both of us had felt as though we didn't see any major decline and had reached a sort of 'leveling off this past month'!  We believe this to be true, other than the results of the diaphragm test showing us differently!  Have we just been especially blessed through the holidays - yes!  Has there really been a leveling off with his muscle loss, we think so...we HOPE so!
Do we still  'issues' to face....it appears so!
But first...
a few more 'mini miracles'!
Last night about 25 (or so) wonderful Priesthood bearers in our ward came to our home to get a demonstration on 'how to help' Joanne tuck Jim in bed.  The lifting (which our son Pat has so ably done for the last 4 months while he and Anna and darling Millie have lived with us) has now been divided each night during the week, between all these worthy volunteers and our four sons who live in the valley!  Pat and Anna-Lisa have bought a home in Sandy and move this Saturday.  They will be sorely missed, as they've not only helped fill us with cheer, but have willingly helped with all the lifting and adjusting that has become our daily routine!  We love and appreciate them more than words can say!  Our other children and siblings have also been wonderful, dropping by with meals, to care, clean or just for mere entertainment.  Have I mentioned this before, WE HAVE WONDERFUL FAMILY SUPPORT ... and wonderful FRIENDS!
So, last night our bedroom was full of a lot of MEN and I admit, I was leery of our privacy being invaded (Jim seems to take this in stride...and is completely without guile or pride - the bad kind)!  In the end - it was a truthfully a thrill and very heartwarming to feel this mighty army of support!  I marvel at how much we are loved and thank one and all for their willingness to help!  It is difficult to be the 'giv-ees' however, but I guess this means....we're growing!

In addition, as December began we also began Hospice.  Now there's an fearsome word!  But we've survived and now have an aid coming in every morning to get Jim out of bed, showered and ready for the day!  Again, leery as we were for this, we are finding that many people are on and off  hospice as their needs come and go!  The 'Caregivers Support Network' (our particular service) has really tried to accommodate our needs and the aids have been competent and friendly!
I suppose the 'mini miracles' we've witnessed lately are these...
 We have once again moved into uncharted territory and are able to accept the changes with gratitude instead of fear!  We can humble ourselves to accept the love and support that others have been so anxious to share!

'Two' last notes!
When leaving the ALS clinic yesterday, a pretty tall woman in her 40's followed me and asked if Jim had ALS!  When I said yes, she admitted (with tears in her eyes) that her husband had just been diagnosed.  He is 45 and they have 12 and 15 year old daughters.  He had been suffering from 'fasciculations' (twitches all over his body -  Jim's identical symptoms) for about six months and had been diagnosed at roughly the same interval of time and same time of year as Jim!  She told me how discouraged her husband was and that she'd just said to him, "but what about our miracle?"  I gave her a big hug (and my phone number) and said - expect and accept the.....
MINI miracles!
Today I had a pedicure from a young Vietnamese woman who nearly died of seizures at this time last year.  She kept repeating....STAY STRONG, everything will be ALL RIGHT!
I think she meant.....
Forward All Issues To Heaven!